Saturday, May 26, 2007

The Anwar, Khairy, Azalina, Samy, Mohd Said and Bung show

If you've been like me... ie. taking a break from political current events - here's a 'state of the union' address to bring you up to speed.

Anwar
  • wanted to be president of PKR (Parti Keadilan Rakyat)
  • wanted it so much that he's been accused of UMNO-esque nomination/voting manipulation
  • Registrar of Societies declines Anwar's request to set aside the 5 year ban on convicted persons from holding party positions
  • Anwar backs out of presidential race, surprising thing is that the 3rd candidate Abdul Rahman Othman backs out as well (refer to bullet point #2 above)
  • His wife wins the presidential race unchallenged
Khairy
  • DAP's Tony Pua says the civil service is a dumping ground for the politically sensitive constituency of unemployed Malay graduates
  • Khairy says that comment is totally unacceptable and without basis. He demands that Pua apologise
  • Pua asserts that Khairy is unable to read and challenges Khairy to talk (debate) instead
  • Khairy refuses and talks cock, sings song about the un-forthcoming apology
Azalina
  • Sports minister charters (ie. $$$) a plane to Everest base camp to hand flag to climbers
  • Big hoohah about Malaysia Book of Records entry as first minister to set foot on the base camp
  • Manchester Utd (MU) football club to tour Malaysia. Asian Football Confederation says no because of clash with Asian cup
  • MU decides not to come, Pak Lah asks why, Khairy talks cock, sings song
  • When questioned by journalists about the debacle, Azalina responds by challenging the journalist to stand for general election (??? huh?) against her
Samy Vellu
  • Two collapsed ceilings, burst water pipes that flooded a building, blackouts, air-conditioning breakdowns and big cracks on the roads, as well as cement patch-ups for the walls of the spanking new Smart traffic-cum-flood tunnel
  • Then the roof of the parliament leaks.
  • Samy blames maintenance staff, other agencies, contractors, too much rain, not enough rain, aging problem (old buildings), teething problems (new buildings) and god himself (act of god).
  • Pak Lah tells him to shut the fuck up and just fix the goddamn problems.
(Close One Eye) Mohd Said and Bung(hole) Mokhtar
  • Parliament's roof leaks (refer Samy Vellu above)
  • Opposition MPs bring this up in parliament... cue DAP MP (Batu Gajah), cutie Fong Poh Kuan
  • COE and Bunghole say Mana ada bocor, Batu Gajah pun tiap-tiap bulan bocor juga (Where is the leak? [MP for] Batu Gajah leaks every month too)"
  • They deny saying it
  • Upon realising that there are these things called cameras (which recorded them saying it), they apologise
  • They retract the apology
  • They apologise again after meeting Sharizat, but qualify it with all sorts of nonsense to make it sound like they were provoked.

All in all, folks, this was a rather interesting month or so. But all the useless politicking and posturing has made one thing absolutely certain. It is that the quality and substance of the "leaders" in this country - (and again, I use that word more loosely than the anuses of MCA's leaders... from all the bending over to UMNO, you see) - leaves much to be desired.

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